Having A Home

#11 Happiness is having a home and a garden of your own

We’re starting to get into list items that don’t really make sense with the movie that I watched. I think I’m going to have to read the book soon. 

I feel like this item kind of goes without saying though, doesn’t it? It’s rather obvious that having a home provides happiness, especially in comparison to being without a home and living on the streets, or having to rely on others, or services, to stay safe. But still, I said I’d write a blog post about each list item, and so I shall. So let’s dissect this, shall we?

Having a home brings a lot of good to someone’s life. Knowing you have a place to hang your hat, or sleep at night in, provides a strong sense of security and safety. I bet a lot of people take advantage of it though, and aren’t even aware of how lucky they are just by having that one item ticked off the list. 

Without a home, one can’t know where they’re sleeping, and we all know how important sleep is to our health, both physically and mentally. Without a safe place to sleep, one would most certainly suffer from fatigue, worsened moods, and a decrease in productivity. How are you supposed to make efforts to find a place if you’re suffering from a lack of sleep to even think properly?

One would have no place to keep their belongings, if they have any, and let’s face it, who doesn’t. And I’m not just talking about your books and stuffed animals, I’m also talking about clothes, food, and other basic needs to live a healthier life. To live in a constant state of fear, or stress, that your belongings could be stolen, ruined, or destroyed, would be just awful. That amount of stress would most certainly affect one's health. We all know (I hope) that increased stress leads to a ton of health issues. It weakens our immune system which leaves us open to all kinds of things like colds and viruses on the regular. It can also lead to cardiovascular issues and digestive problems (not taking into account the issues of eating well when you don’t have a home). Increased stress can cause headaches, muscle tension and aches. It can exacerbate, or contribute to, such challenges or disorders as anxiety, depression, and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). It can lead to creating and perpetuating unhealthy coping mechanisms like overeating, substance abuse, and withdrawal from the community. And of course, it can affect one’s sleep also, bringing us back to where we started this paragraph.

Of course, living without a home also leaves one more vulnerable, not only to the elements but also to other risks such as violence, theft and exploitation, and legal issues. I couldn’t imagine trying to deal with any of that when likely, all I want is a warm place to rest my head at night.

I think it’s pretty clear then, why having a home and garden of your own contributes to happiness. We could take the list item though and break down how it specifically states “of your own”. 

It’s true, owning a home, historically speaking, has very much contributed to the happiness of a person, or family. Not only does it fulfill a lot of the basic human needs; shelter, food, hygiene, security, but it also allows us to dwell with those we love. As a parent, I felt a very strong sense of gratitude for that. In North America especially, we pride ourselves on owning a home and ‘getting into the market’ as real estate is one of the more accessible ways to possibly create some wealth. It seems to be getting harder and harder, and the truth is, I don’t know how my kids are going to be able to afford a home in their lifetime, but I digress. So, it’s good for the individual, and for the family, but it’s also good for the community. When you own a home, there’s a strong change you then become a part of a community at large. Whether it be through neighborhood watch, the school district (if you have children), the home owner’s association (or something like it), a BIA (business improvement area), or even a condo board - you’ve joined a community. Now, sometimes communities can be a source of stress, but with every con there is almost certainly some sort of pro. Getting to know your neighbors can be a very positive thing. They can become a source of support should you need it - babysitting, snow shoveling while you’re away on vacation, food when you’re battling an illness, etc. Perhaps there is some sort of community when one is living without a home, but I must admit, I have difficulty seeing and believing it. I’m sure there are those out there making efforts to make it so though. But it’s not the same. 

Owning a home allows one to feel secure, and also one with the world, perhaps even nature. I remember buying my first home and feeling like I was finally doing something right. It’s a huge right of passage in our society, and I can only imagine it sucks if you don’t have the opportunity to take part in it.

Of course, there are many movements now that are trying to change the way we’ve lived as a society for some time. Rather than buying homes and partaking in society and community as we’ve done in the past, they’re creating or perpetuating new ways of doing so.

The tiny home movement is a fairly large one. It’s hard to know how big it has become as it is decentralized, but still, I keep seeing and reading more and more about it on social media and web sites. To be honest, it’s quite intriguing to think of living more simply and efficiently in a small, often mobile, home. Typically, tiny homes are anywhere from 100 to 500 square feet (though I’m sure there are larger ones out there). The movement prioritizes minimalist living, sustainability, and affordability. It’s often about making a smaller footprint on the environment by using fewer resources and having lower energy consumptions. Affordability as it’s supposed to take less money to build, maintain, and operate a tiny home than a regular one. It’s about living more simply, living with less and prioritizing experiences and relationships rather than material possessions. Within the tiny home movement there is a strong sense of community also. It’s possible that many who opt-in to purchase or build a tiny home face some backlash from their family and friends as it is deemed as ‘going against the grain’. Thankfully, within the movement, there is a strong community of other tiny home dwellers that can support newcomers, whether it be by helping them to plan and build, or support them once they’ve moved in and are adjusting to the new lifestyle. Of course, more than just the (possible) lack of social acceptance, it comes with other challenges too. Land access can be a big one as a lot of governments (municipal, regional, provincial, maybe even federal) have zoning and regulatory barriers in place that make it difficult to legally build or place a tiny home somewhere. Banks, and other lending institutions, are often very hesitant to lend to those who wish to build or buy a tiny home as they believe it a risk - due to limited resale value, concerns about its marketability and regulatory challenges, and perhaps also the belief that there is a higher default risk as they may believe tiny home buyers have lower credit scores, limited financial resources, and unconventional employment situations. All unfair, but I digress - the banks are in it for themselves.

There is also the “van/bus life” movement. It consists of those who purchase a large van or bus and convert it into a home on wheels. Participants often seek freedom, adventure, and a simpler way of living. They often travel extensively, living off-grid and amid nature for extended periods of time. In many ways, it is very similar to the tiny home movement, it’s simply a lot smaller (typically) and much easier to move around. 

One more ‘movement’ that I’ve come across is quite small, I believe, but is very unique. It is when a person (or people) choose to live on a cruise ship, rather than own their own home. Apparently, in some areas of the world, it is cheaper to live on an all-expense paid cruise than to own your own home. I can imagine such appeals as being able to travel extensively, having all of your food provided for you (with extra restaurants on board typically), tons of entertainment and social opportunities, and access to other amenities such as spas, fitness equipment, organized activities, and basic health care (there is always a ship doctor in case of emergencies). In many ways, my brain is asking me “where do we sign up”? I have cruised a few times and it is so much fun, but personally, I don’t know if I could handle living that way for an extended period of time. Not to mention, I have no idea what’s required regarding visas or immigration rules, what kind of health coverage one would need, or how much it would cost, let alone what would happen if I needed some sort of major surgery or other care. Would I have to get off at the nearest port and hope for the best? Or can I get coverage that would fly me home? On the surface, it sounds amazing and exciting, and because I’m still young(ish) and healthy, why the hell not? But, there are aspects of it that make me feel uncertain for sure.

All that to say, I think it’s great that there are those who are going against the grain because, despite the belief (and scientifically proven fact) that having your own home most certainly contributes to one’s happiness, it doesn’t necessarily have to be how it’s been historically done. 

Having said that, my husband and I were fortunate enough to get back in the market recently and I must say, we are both elated and relieved. In our circumstances, we are almost certain that getting back into the market is the only way we’ll be able to help our kids as much as we’d like to in the future (not that we’re not trying other avenues also). We move into our new home at the end of May and I am so looking forward to making it our own, our forever home. And I’m not going to lie, that makes me really happy. :) 

Ⓒ April 2024. Beki Lantos. All Rights Reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, or transmitted in any form by any means without prior written permission of the author.